My dad has a reputation with the referees at my water polo games. He has been known to get heated when he feels they are missing fouls or calling unfairly. I remember a few experiences when he even went to go talk to the referees during or after the games about how unhappy he was with them.

This is not something that is unique to my dad. However, he has a valid excuse to behave erratically at my water polo games: he is also my coach. Though it makes me uncomfortable when I see him getting unusually heated, I understand it. I cannot understand though when other parents get as intense or more than him.  

Having played four sports throughout my high school career, I’ve seen my share of parent-fanatics. Though I have spent many water polo games and soccer games rolling my eyes at parents who think they can call the game better than the referees, a few particular situations stick out in my mind of sheer absurdity. Last year, at the state swim meet I went up to the stands above the pool deck to grab food from one of the parents. As I made my way down the packed row of parents, I felt a hard tap on my shoulder.  

“HEY! Grand Haven!” I heard behind me.

I looked back, unsure if the person meant me.

“GET. OUT. OF. MY. WAY!” yelled a middle aged woman wearing a black and yellow shirt for an east side team.  

I looked at her with disbelief. Then, a few of her fellow black and yellow parent friends joined in chiding me for nothing other than walking in the aisle in front of them in the stands. At first I turned to see if I had blocked them from watching a fast race, perhaps a 50 free. It was the 500. A five minute race. These parents were nuts.  

Even worse than being chastised as an athlete is being chastised as a referee. Perhaps the most traumatizing experience I’ve ever had involved with parents was when refereeing TCYSO soccer. I was a sophomore and spent my Saturday volunteering to call U10 soccer games.  During one game, a father upset that I called foul on his 8 year old son confronted me in the middle of the game to tell me that he thought I was a terrible referee. I was an unpaid volunteer, and it was a U10 soccer game. Scores aren’t even kept at that age, but the man still felt the need to come get in my face. I felt very fortunate that the man eventually backed down and was not more confrontational.  

Parent involvement in their kid’s sports is fantastic, having a fanbase is great for them.  However parents getting overly invested in their kids can be uncomfortable and unhealthy. In our community alone, we have had instances of everything from rude parents trash talking athletes to even attacking coaches.  This is not only uncomfortable for athletes, but other parents, officials, and coaches.  Athletics are a vital part of learning to grow as socially and physically, and our youth need a positive environment to do this in.  If parents cannot contain themselves over high school and youth sports, no child can be expected to learn to do anything more.  A soccer game would not make a worthy cause for one’s first assault charges.